When's the best time to have another baby is something I've been thinking about a lot.
If I had a dollar for every time someone asks: “So when are you going back?” or “Luna looking like she wants a sibling”, let’s just say I would make a killing.
I guarantee you my two-year-old is in no way capable to utter such words.
The thought of “going back” as we Caribbean people love to say, crosses my mind every so often and often triggers a mixture of anxiety and trauma while simultaneously rekindling that newborn love all over again.
It really is a scary but exciting feeling to say the least.
When's the best time to have another baby?
But when is the best time to even have another child?
Some people say “Don’t have them too close, enjoy the first and then have another when the first is in primary school”, while others say “No no, have them back to back so you can get it over with and don’t lose touch with the newborn phase”.
Meanwhile I’m here like…
How do I know when I’m ready?
I would say it’s a mixture of being mentally and physically ready for me, so there are a couple of questions I ask myself frequently:
- Am I ready for this change?
- Is my partner ready?
- Can I financially handle another child right now? (in this economy)
- Am I ready to go through that sleep deprivation phase again?
- Can my current child handle this change and be welcoming?
- How do I share my love?
- Do I have the energy for two children?
- I’m getting older so do I want to have the rest of my children when I’m in my late 30’s ?
- Am I ready to go through the drastic changes with my body again ?
- Can I afford a private delivery this round?
- Am I confident enough in my mom abilities?
- Have I recovered?
Just let it happen
These questions flow through my mind constantly, and every day I update the answers in my head as well out loud with my partner.
But you know what I’ve realized over time?
There’s no way to prepare yourself for this, for the change, and the love that will come.
After speaking to my other mom friends who have had babies when their kids are still under two - “two under two” we like to call it - they’ve all said the same thing; the love just rushes in and you find the time, the patience, the money.
Everything just works itself out in the end.
God has a plan
I think my problem is that I keep psyching myself out and doubting my abilities as a mom when really and truly, I got this!
We as moms need to stop putting pressure on ourselves; society does it enough so we don’t need it from ourselves too.
I truly believe that everything happens for a reason and God always has a plan.
I can safely say my baby fever is through the roof and I am confident in my partner and I’s ability to raise another.
So, whenever it happens and we are blessed with another baby, I know I will be over the moon and I know the questions won't go away immediately but everything will start to fall into place one by one.
What’s for you, will always be for you!